Austin Scott: 12-13 Months

This month flew by. Like, I don't know where it went or exactly what we did and I only have a handful of pictures. However, it has been an absolutely beautiful October and even though I failed to document almost any of it - we have been making the most of our little life together.

Stats: Fits into 9 month or 9-12 month clothes better than 12 month and wayyyyy better than 12-18 month things. (Which has made buying him winter clothes super hard because all his new clothes drown him but I can't justify buying 9 month sweaters when I know he'll grow out of them soon. Two teeth. His hair is filling in, although he's still a ways away from needing any sort of haircut. Size 3 diapers. 

Other things from this month to remember: 

-We've spent a lot of time in the car. Driving back and forth from my grandmothers, running errands, visiting other family members. I looked back through my planner as I was prepping to write this post and I realized that every single week there were several things involved riding around in the car. Luckily, this little guy is an amazing car traveler. He almost never cries, he's content to hold things and play with them, and just does really great. He switches back and forth from his infant carseat to his big carseat, mostly because I love having the "extra" seat so we can bring little friends with us sometimes, so whenever we have another child in the car he gets relegated back to the infant seat (and sometimes I think he likes it better and it's easier for me to see him and give him things in the infant seat so on long car rides I'll put him there.) But he's getting too big for it now, and I'm going to have to take out the infant seat and only have the big carseat (and I'm a little sad to be loosing my "extra" carseat). 

-Broke through his second tooth on the bottom and the one on the top is looking like it's going to pop through soon.

- He loves climbing into cupboards. We have a whole bunch more... stuff... in the cupboard than we used to - but he just moves it out of his way (or climbs over it) so he can climb on in. He has no problem getting in, but he does have a hard time getting back out and usually just starts yelling when he's ready for me to help him out.

-Really, really says Mama now. I mean, he did before. But now it's very clear that he says my name when he wants me or when he's addressing me. Or when he's mad at me. 

-David teases me that Austin is a complete mama's boy (mostly because he says my name all. the. time. especially when he's sad). But Austin looooves his Daddy, too. When David gets home from work Austin will light up -a grin breaking over his face- and will run into his arms to give him a hug. 

-He's started playing the cutest game where he'll take turns walking to me and giving me a hug, then turning around and walking to David to give him a hug.

-He isn't really a cuddler, not like some babies are, but he gives the best hugs. He won't stay forever, but he'll give you a huge hug and lay his head on your shoulder and pat your arm and snuggle in nice and tight. It melts me. Then he's off again exploring something new. Those hugs mean the world to me.

-He's little. When he's around other kids his same age he looks tiny, like easily months younger than them. But he's started to look older, even though his body is in the smaller percentile he looks like he's one because of the intelligence in his eyes and the intentionality about his actions. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's been a subtle change I've watched happening. Oh, and the best way to make him look as old as he really is, is to put him next to a smaller baby. Here he is with Audrey Delahunty, my sweet friend Cassie's daughter. Audrey 4 months, Austin 12 months.

-Started signing more and all-done, again. He is a great eater and eats pretty much whatever I feed him but loves bananas and when he sees one he'll yell until I open it for him.

--He's so happy, almost all the time. People comment frequently about how happy and easygoing he is and it's really true. He only gets upset if he's really, really tired and I've pushed him too far. (Even if he's just mostly tired he's pretty happy.) He is a tough little guy and rarely even cries when he bumps his head or falls over, even if it looks like it is bad. I am so grateful to be blessed with such a happy baby.

 ^^^^^ Case in point: pushing him too far when it's already an hour past his bedtime. ^^^ 

-I should clarify. Austin is very happy and doesn't fuss much. But he does yell. A lot. Especially when he's not getting his way. Lots of yelling.

-He is adored everywhere we go. It's hard not to love this boy. 

-Says "uh-oh" if something falls down or if he does something he's not supposed to (like throwing a toy away in the garbage can).

-I can't contain him. At church. At home. Anywhere that he isn't strapped into something is basically a giant battle of him trying to escape and me trying to keep him from making huge messes or climbing on things that he could fall off. (Church especially. #countdowntonursery)

-Messes include: pulling all the wipes out of the package, pulling all the garbage out of the bathroom garbage can, putting all the garbage into the toilet, putting other toys into the toilet, throwing away anything he can into the kitchen garbage can, pulling all the crayons/papers out of their bin and leaving them on the panty floor, pulling all of the socks out of the sock basket. Do you see a theme? Oh, and throwing all of his food off of his highchair tray if I don't remove it quickly enough after he says all-done.

-We have this big cube/box that is about 18 inches square and it plays a different song on each side. Austin loves it and has figured out how to turn the cube or shake it to make the music start. Then he dances by bending his legs or stomping his feet and it's darling. 

-Loves to throw balls and is really good at it. He can throw with both hands and with one hand. He knows when to release the ball to make it actually go far. He loves to play roll the ball back and forth with you (or sometimes throw the ball off the couch to mom who then gives it back, repeat.)

-If I'm sitting at the computer, it's like a signal to both kids to want to climb up on my lap. Austin especially. I'd actually be quite content if he'd just sit on my lap, but he wants to touch the keys and the mouse and the... everything. It makes actually doing anything on the computer with him impossible. 

-Learned how to go down the stairs backwards. 

-I give him 2 naps a day. One at 9:30 and one around 2. However, I think that he actually only sleeps during one of those naps and it switches back and forth which one he actually takes.  He plays quietly in his bed the other nap, and he needs both of them, so it's a good system right now. No nap is ever longer than an hour and a half though. 

-He has the best laugh and laughs the most at Lydia. He loves her. And she loves him. The second half of this video isn't anything special but the first half is SO darling that I had to include it.

Darling-boy. We love you. And really, who could blame us?

Walker Pumpkin Carving 2015

It's easily the favorite family tradition in the Walker Family. Each year we get together and carve pumpkins. All growing up, we carved pumpkins with our parent's best friends, the Olivers. The past couple of years. now that both families are grown (and most of the Olivers don't live very close) we haven't been able to get together with them, but we still think of them and talk about how wonderful they are, so it still counts.... almost. My mom just posted this photo from... probably about 20 years ago. Isn't it a gem? (That's me, my dad, and my little brother, Matthew.)

We are proud to be carrying on the tradition. 

This last weekend we got together with my parents and siblings for our annual party. Complete with Cheesy Potato Soup, fun pumpkin designs, a couple rounds of werewolf and a dice game. 

---

A is for Austin and for Aggies. Win.

My parents grew these awesome pumpkins in their garden with the help of Matthew and Melissa. There are actually four pumpkins, but the other one was already inside prepping for it's Yoda design. (See pictures below.) I'm so impressed with how big they are. My dad carved the biggest one and we decided to get a picture with Austin sitting inside. Cute, right?

Yeah, he pretty much hated the entire thing. Even when we tried to bribe him with a marshmallow. Fail.

Lydia requested an apple on her pumpkin. We asked repeatedly, giving her lots of different options of what she might like. A panda, a funny face, the letters of her name, etc... But nope. She wanted an apple please. And she didn't want a bite out of it - she wanted it to be a whole apple. So that's what she got. David and I picked a little pumpkin for ourselves because we figured if we were carving 3 pumpkins, they all better be little. After much deliberation, we decided to carve the silhouette of a dancing couple. I think it turned out great. 

Last story of the night. All growing up, we had a Halloween countdown named Frankie. My mom would use saran wrap to make a candy countdown to hang on this little Frankenstein guy. We would get to cut off a piece of candy each day and we loved it! There's been a bit of deliberation about who got to inherit Frankie, with Jenna claiming that she called dibs yeaaaaars ago. Unbeknownst to us, Melissa coordinated with my dad to cut out the frankie shapes for each one of us and then she handpainted them and surprised us with them that night. I can't believe the planning, the time, and the talent that went into recreating these for each of us. We love them! Melissa also supplied the saran wrap and candy for each of us to make one countdown chains for each family. I can't wait to get ours hung up. I just know it's going to become a wonderful Peaden tradition, too. 

Happy October and Happy Halloween from the Walker Family. 

My Grandma Walker

A while back, towards the end of August we got a phone call from my dad saying that my Grandma Walker had just gotten back from the hospital and that the doctors said that her body was all but shut down so that any family who would like to come and say goodbye should probably do so in the next couple of days. My Grandma's health hasn't been great for a long time, so it didn't come as a surprise- but it was very emotional. We cancelled our plans and immediately drove to Wyoming to visit with her and share with her how much we loved her. I was surprised to see how well she looked for someone whose body had stopped functioning. We visited with her and the other family members who had come to see her, but as it was approaching dinnertime she started worrying about what we were all going to eat. This wonderful woman has served her children and grandchildren and even on this day where we had all gathered to say goodbye she was worried about us and taking care of us. She asked my cousin to order pizza for everyone, and after we were all eating she even decided to have a slice herself.

When I hugged her goodbye I couldn't help but cry at the thought that I wouldn't be able to see her again in this life. She feebly hugged me back and whispered to me "I love you, dear. Everything is going to be all right." Those words touched my heart. I was finishing up preparing a talk about how daily Gospel living brings us closer to Jesus Christ, and it was clear to me that my Grandma is a woman who has lived her whole life with love in her heart for the Lord, who knows Him and His plan, and who was continuing to live a life of service to the very end.

It's a weird thing to say goodbye to someone you think is dying. So many unsaid words, thoughts, feelings. I think it was a little weird for her, too. When we got a very similar message about David's Grandma, Blanche McAllister, we went to visit and she slept through the whole visit. It was a markedly different visit with my Grandma Walker.

My Grandma is wonderfully stubborn and clearly doesn't care what the doctors say about her time left here on earth. I couldn't be more grateful. She is very sick and is in quite a bit of pain, which requires someone to be with her the the majority of the day. My Aunt and cousin have been picking up the majority of the work, which is an incredible service that I know is exhausting and emotionally draining. I wish that I lived closer and could do more, but I've been blessed to be able to spend several days with her, just visiting and helping to take care of her (and my grandpa's) needs. Plus it's given my Aunt and cousin a little break. (I'm not fooling myself, I know that the few days over the past month hasn't been much more than a drop in the bucket as far as giving them a break goes, but I am glad to be able to do something.)

I'm writing about this now because although my grandma is in pain, is frustrated at feeling like a burden and is ready to go, I have been incredibly blessed to be able to go to her home, to be with her, and to serve her. My heart wells up at the thought of the opportunity I've had over the past month to spend this sacred time in a place that I cherish. Here are some of my feelings:

-Some of my very favorite childhood memories take place up at my grandparent's ranch. Seeing Lydia love climbing in the big tree in the backyard, swinging on the tire swing, playing on the "tippy trailer", and riding tractors with my grandpa has brought me so much joy. She's experienced these things some when we've been up visiting for holidays, but it's a completely different thing to see her start to become more comfortable as she spends more and more time in these places that I love.  Lydia has now driven both a Razer and a tractor by herself, with the assistance of my uncle and grandpa, respectively. She's fed cats and gotten stuck in the big tree and driven through the open fields to see the cows. She's experiencing all of the things that make the ranch so special and I'm so glad for it.

-I hope that I can be as gracious and polite throughout my life as my Grandma has been and continues to be. She says please and thank you and excuse me even in situations that I think I would be hard pressed to respond so graciously.

-I love to see my grandma and grandpa. They are such special people to me in my life. However, I rarely have taken the time to go and visit them - just because. We try to make it up for holidays and branding (which is pretty much like a holiday) and other family events but there is only one other time that I can ever think of that we went up just to be there (and even then, I'm pretty sure my dad was there and asked us to come so he could take Lydia on a tractor and show her the cows). This has been a wonderful excuse for me to be able to come and spend the time there that I always wanted - but never made the time for. I had a card half written for my grandma that I hadn't finished or sent when we went to visit my grandma to say "goodbye". I absolutely know that it's selfish of me, but I'm just feeling so grateful that I am able to do the things that I would have felt guilty for not doing if she had passed away sooner. (I know that sounds a little awful. I'm not making these visits out of perceived past or future guilt. Rather, there is just something that feels good about doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing.)

-When I say Wyoming, some people think that I'm crazy. But my grandparents live in a little town just past Evanston which is just over the Utah border. It takes about 2 hours and 15 minutes to get there. To get there in time to help my grandparents get breakfast at 8:00 a.m. I get my kids in the car at 5:30 a.m. then drive the almost-2.5 hours to be there. I've thought about staying overnight, but it's not really feasible, at least not right now. Then later that afternoon/evening we make the same trek home. It's a long day, but I'm just so grateful that it's do-able and that even if I can't be there every day, I can at least try to be there every other week. (I really, really, really want to be able to do it every week, but at least for right now every other week is giving us a good balance.)

-As I was washing the dishes one day when I was visiting I noted how peaceful I felt. It's not very often in my life that I know without a doubt that I am in the exact right place doing the exact right thing. More often, I feel worried and tired - full of should be's and what comes next's. I worry about not doing enough and about doing too much. But when I am there, I feel completely peaceful and happy. What a blessing this has been to me in a rather turbulent time in my life. (It helps that my phone doesn't get service and so I am truly disconnected from the rest of the world

I know my Grandma doesn't feel well and I pray often for her comfort. I will selfishly take every day I get to spend with her as a blessing, and hope that we can help remind her of how much she is loved and appreciated.

(All the pictures shown here were taken that first visit, and don't adequately capture the peace and love that I've felt as I've repeated our visits. But I wanted them here for a record.)