And there he was...

 “I walked in to a room and there he was. He looked at me and I looked at him. That’s all there was to it. Like, I was always in love with him, no falling necessary. Like finding the perfect pair of shoes. “ Joyce, Thursday Murder Club

This was a quote from an audiobook I recently listened to, and I just loved it so much. It doesn't really describe the way that David I met and fell in love - but it speaks to the heart of how I feel about him right now. It's like, there isn't an existence where he doesn't love me and I don't love him. Like, I was always in love with him. Being with him feels like coming home. This quote touched me so much I stopped and listened to it over and over while I wrote it down. I didn't know what to do with it until I was going through pictures and found this picture of us that a child (probably Lucy) snapped of us during church. I don't remember this picture being taken - but I love the way I am looking at him. He's my best friend. 

Valentine's Day

It's always lovely when other people celebrate "the day" that David and I officially connected, "the day" that started us on our path to where we are now. For my part, that used to be my least favorite day of the year (full of commercialism and forced attention - I once wrote a column in my high school newspaper about it, ha) is now one of my favorite days of the year, if only to remember how sweet David has ALWAYS been to me and also to remind me how lucky I am to have him by my side now. 

Although this year we didn't do much/anything by way of celebration (other than, you know, him letting me go to Hawaii with my mom and grandma for the week), I wanted to acknowledge that this marks our 14th Valentine's Day together - which means it's our GOLDEN Valentine's Day. And truly, this man is made of pure gold. The picture above was taken in while we were dating. I'm so grateful that one fateful Valentine's Day turned into that, which turned into THIS: 

These pictures didn't turn out as well as I'd hoped, but I wanted to include them anyway - on my sister's trip, David and I snuck away from the group for just a minute to check out the view of the store we were at. (You can see our house in the distance.) Melissa snapped the photos. One of the things I love about David is the little pockets of time we can sneak in to be together. Everything from a weekend away, to scooting right next to him on the church bench when a child gets distracted and moves away for a moment. The feeling of his arm around my shoulders pulling me close gives me the same loved feeling that a whole weekend away with him does - only in different sized doses. I love him and love to be with him. I'm so grateful we are sharing this life together. 

And now those two young people in the first picture, have produced a whole gaggle of children who ALSO love Valentine's Day. 

We keep things pretty simple at home usually, but a small box of chocolates and a few small items for a Valentine surprise in the morning - plus a homeschool valentine's party in the afternoon and I'd call the day a smashing success. 

David is the very very BEST

The title is so blatantly obvious that it seems like it shouldn't even need to be said. Anyone who knows David knows that he is the "very very BEST". They'd just respond, "Yeah, duh." 

But this post is exactly about that. 

David is the very very best.

He's been working from home since March, in a sudden and unexpected work situation. He's had an even heavier workload than usual due to some extra projects that he's working on at the National level (which means he's working on those projects PLUS everything he normally does at his local office). He has a large church calling and he supports me unfailingly in my time-consuming calling. 

And did I mention that ALL sports have been canceled for months and months? 

I know that he is feeling the stress of this difficult time. But instead of complaining or getting upset, he has doubled-down on strengthening his spiritual foundation, making sure he is giving 100% to his kids, and treating me like the most important thing in his whole life. 

He has a determined, hard-working, and faithful heart of gold. 

David has been taking the biggest load where this blog is concerned. He's doing all of the Coronavirus blogging updates, and 90% of the posts. My brain hasn't been able to handle sitting down and writing about it, and I've been doing a very, very few posts - basically only the kid's monthly/yearly updates. The only reason that this record of our lives didn't fizzle and die this year is because of his consistent and dedicated efforts.  I'm grateful for the value that he sees in the recording of our lives. I'm grateful for the effort that he puts into the hard work around him - into making our lives better. 

Here is an absolutely not-comprehensive list of things that David has done for me THIS week: 

-Blogged. 

-Woken up with the kids so I could go on a walk with a friend. 

-Rubbed my back as I fell asleep at night. 

-Made me laugh until I cried. 

-Did the dishes unprompted, multiple times

-Brought the garbage can out with me because it was too heavy for me to do without struggling with it for a long time, even though he had an important meeting to prepare for.

-Made me breakfast. 

-Took off my glasses and put them in a safe place when I fell asleep with them on. 

-Let me read a book in my bedroom while I ate a piece of chocolate while he played with the kids. 

-Helped me make dinner. 

-Told me my dinner was amazing, even though it wasn't. 

-Cleaned the basement with the kids, including vacuuming. 

-Started cleaning and organizing Lucy's room on his own, even though I was feeling overwhelmed by it and wasn't planning to clean it even though it was a disaster of leftover storage room things, clothes boxes, and toys/books. Once he started I jumped in and it feels amazing in there now. 

-Took care of the kids for 8+ hours while I was at Stake Baptisms. 

-Went out after the kids were in bed so we could try some new spicy chicken sandwiches.

-Went on a bike ride with me and the kids because I wanted to. 

-Rubbed my back because he knew I was worried about something.

-Told me I was a responsible human when I wasn't acting like a responsible human. 

-Made me feel happy when I was feeling sad. 

-Shared his testimony with me. 

-Made me a grilled cheese sandwich.

-Told me that he loved me, unprompted, with a long list of things he appreciated about me. 

-Got me water at dinner when I forgot to get myself a water. 

-Waited to watch all of his sports until after the kids (and I) were asleep.

-Manned the wheel of our "ship" while I went to minister to a friend/ward sister and started making dinner while I was gone. 

-He swept the floor after dinner every single night (my least favorite kitchen job).

-Pretended he was a Robot chasing the kids up the stairs at bedtime and made me laugh so hard.

-Worked hard every day at his job, at his calling, and to take care of our home.

These are just the ones I can think of as I'm sitting here. But I know there are another 10 lists worth of items just like these in all five of the love languages.  In fact, I would submit that the way that David loves us is such a good example of true love.

David is the very, very best. He is carrying a large load right now, but he makes such a big difference to me in my life and I wanted to recognize him for the good that he is doing and the difference he is making. Here's hoping he can make it through September (a very very busy month for him at work) and that I can offer even half of the love and support that he offers to me. 

10 Year Anniversary

I'm back-posting this blog post (including the pictures) because as I was going through what blogs I needed/wanted to write I realized I never posted an official post about our 10 year anniversary. Even though this year our anniversary was pretty low-key and that we've been focused on other things - I feel like a 10 year anniversary deserves at least a blog post. 

It's hard to explain how grateful I am to be married to David. Most of the words come out sounding trite. Phrases like "best friend", "makes me laugh", or "best husband" don't do justice to the joy I feel when I think about David. Sometimes we talk about when we were dating and I start getting this panicky feeling inside- "What if?" "What if I had made the wrong choice and not married him!?" It seems silly, but the truth is - I had no idea then just how happy he would make me or what a good team we would make together. I knew I loved him, and I knew I wanted to be with him - but fast forward ten years and looking at this family we have built together I am just so grateful for this marriage of ours. 

A few fun facts about the past 10 years: 

-We've lived in 3 different homes (Logan, Lehi, Lehi)

-We've traveled to 15 states together.

-We've binged watched many a TV series, some of our favorites being: White Collar, Remington Steel, Star Trek Next Gen, Eureka, Psych, Scorpion.

-Our favorite entertainment of choice is now Hallmark channel, Food Network, and HGTV.

-Our go-to at-home date night is to pick up Arby's and Panda to eat after the kids are in bed and watch a show or just sit and talk. 

-Our current favorite joke to tell each other: When we are closing up the house for the night and the half-bathroom light is on, it looks like it's a door to the outside in daytime because of the kind of lightbulbs that are in there. So the joke goes: "Hey, do you need anything from the Portal before I turn it off?" or some variation of that. It looks like a portal to another world and it's hilarious every time (which is basically every night). So when I say I'm grateful for David's sense of humor - I mostly mean that I'm grateful that we have the same sense of humor! 

-Sometimes when it's late and we're supposed to go to bed, we just lay in the dark and talk for another hour or so. We both know we will be tired the next day, but it's worth it for those few more minutes to just talk to each other. 

-We say that we love to just be together, even if that means that we're both just out working in the yard (which is a big deal, because neither of us particularly like yardwork). 

These past ten years have had their share of tears - but there has always been enough peace and happiness to balance the tears out. 

We've had hard work and we've had spontaneous adventures. 

We've brought four tiny spirits into our home to love and teach. 

We balance each other out and work as a team to accomplish all the things. 

David, we're not going on any fancy cruise or traveling aborad to celebrate. But the size of the celebration doesn't matter. (There wouldn't be a celebration big enough to fully capture the full extent of joy anyway.) I'm grateful to be married to you. I'm grateful for the way you treat me, the way you treat our kids. I'm grateful for the corny jokes and the way we laugh-cringe at cheesy hallmark movies. 

I'm grateful for your example of hard work and of faith. 

I love you. And in the long-scheme of things 10 years doesn't seem like very much. In 30 and 40 years, we will look back at these pictures and think that we are still babies. But I'm grateful for these past ten years with you and I want you to know how much happiness you bring to me every single day.

Our First Date, 10 years later....

This February marks ten years since our first date. On Valentine's Day 2008, we ran into each other on campus and even though we already had known each other casually, something clicked. David came and spent the evening at my computer lab while I worked then walked me home and spent some time with me and my pink-and-chocolate-crazed roommates where he handled us all with charm and ease and showed off his awesome skills of being able to fit through the tiny space between his folded arms while holding onto a broomstick. He asked me out for our first official date soon after, and in the best decision I'd possible made up that that point in my life - I said yes. 

As part of David's Christmas gift this year I pre-planned 12 dates for us to go on. February's date was a clever copy of our first date, ten year ago. A gift card to Chilis, $$ to go bowling, and a RedBox coupon code as a nod to the time we spent at the Blockbuster (David says that maybe it was Hollywood Video?) browsing movies while we waited to be seated at Chilis, and a couple of notecards for each of us to make a set of conversation starters. I also included an excerpt of where we had written out our first date when we engaged to read (Posted on March 1, 2009)

February 22, 2008 Logan, Utah The question of whether David would be able to handle the crazy girls in PineView #3 {specifically me} was answered soon after when David asked me on our first date. I said yes, and was very excited. When I asked for her phone number she sounded excited, when I asked her out and she said yes, she did not sound all that excited, more... surprised that I was asking. At least she said yes. As I was getting ready for the date I couldn't decide what to wear and ended up borrowing a shirt from my roommate Cassie. (This is important for two reasons. 1- The shirt that I wore was brown with white polka dots and plays a role later on in the story [be patient], and 2- I had two shirts that I switched off wearing on the first dates that I went on. I felt comfortable in them and they were cute. I had worn one or the other on every first date I had gone pretty much the whole year. They were labeled as my "first date" shirts and it was unusual that I didn't wear one of them.) I went into the date not knowing what to expect. I half-thought that it would be another first date that didn't go anywhere. However, the second that he picked me up I could tell that something was different about him. We went to Chili's and then bowling (my mom's number one date idea, points for David). I was completely blown away by how amazing this boy was. He was cute and funny and kind and amazing. Most of all... he understood me. We connected on a level that I had never even dreamed could be reached on a first date. I laughed the whole time, and at the end of the date there was no question of if there would be a second date... only when it would be.  It really was such a fantastic first date, mostly because of how amazing Shantel is. We were able to talk so easily. We waited about 45 minutes to get a table at Chili's, and talked easily the whole time. We chatted during dinner, and then during bowling, we had to wait for another 45 minutes. Which usually, it might be tough to keep thinking of things to talk about on a first date, but we had no trouble. One of Shantel's favorite things to talk about is how she beat me at bowling on our first date. The first game we tied, the second game she won. However, of course she was going to beat me, I was really distracted by how wonderful she was. In fact, the reason she knew there would be a second date is because I was making it pretty clear that I would be asking her out shortly.

When reading through the brief recap that we wrote back in 2009, I was surprised that some of the things that I remember most about the date are not included at all, and some of the things that we did record - I'd completely forgotten. So, we decided that it would be fun to write down our memories of our first date, ten years later!

David's Perspective: 

It was really interesting looking back at what we posted in our wedding series about our first date, because most of the things that I remembered were not even in there. It was fun on our date to talk about those things that we remembered about that date. Here are some of the things (big and small) that I remember about it:

-While we were waiting to be seated at Chili's we walked across the parking lot to the Hollywood Video (movie rental store) and looked through movies and chatted while we waited. While we were talking about favorite movies, Shantel told me that she does not watch PG-13 movies. I remember thinking, that is interesting and this girl seems really good. 

-I ordered a steak, which was a big deal for me, because I rarely went out to eat on dates and certainly tried to order something less expensive if I did. Not that Chili's steak was so expensive, but it was $2 or $3 more. I have no idea what Shantel ordered. I do remember how much I enjoyed talking to her. That was my favorite thing. I joked about have a date notecard that I was using to help with the conversation and it made it even more fun. 

-When we were bowling I remember specifically giving her a high five one time for a good bowl and then as our hands come down, just holding my hand against hers for an extra 1/4 of a second. Shantel was beautiful and kind and fun and I knew I wanted to go out with her again. 

-Shantel reminded me on our 10 year date that during dinner I talked about hiking to the top of Mount Timpanogos over the summer and talked about how we should do it together during the next summer.

Shantel's Perspective: 

David mentioned most of the things that we talked about on our date. A few more details from my perspective: 

-I specifically remember David joking about how he'd made a notecard for conversation topics/questions to make sure that things kept going smoothly. It is exactly the kind of cheesy and slightly-awkward joke that he tells that still makes me laugh today.

-I usually didn't tell people on a first date that I don't watch PG-13 movies. It was just a hard conversation because too frequently people were offended by it - like they thought that I thought that they were bad people. I didn't, and still don't. It's just a personal choice that has been an incredibly positive thing in my life. When we weren't seated at Chilis right away, we walked over to a video store. (I remember it being a Blockbuster - but whether it was Blockbuster or Hollywood Video, it's SO crazy to me that there isn't a single movie-rental store left. I should probably detail out for posterity that this was a store where you could go roam the isles and select from hundreds of movies mostly DVDs at this point, although I'm sure there was still an isle of VHSs. You'd pick the movie you wanted to rent, pay for it at the front desk, then have to return it 5-7 days later. ) It was fun to browse the movies and point out our favorites and talk about genres that we both liked. But I was definitely nervous because I knew the conversation would have to end up with me saying that I didn't watch PG-13 movies. David's reaction might be one of the things that I loved most about him from the very start, because he didn't get worked up about it. He didn't make it a big deal. He asked a few honest questions and then accepted it and moved on. Over the course of our dating, he ended up adopting the standard, and although I won't say that we've always made stellar media viewing choices, I think that it set a precedent that has blessed our marriage and our family. (I always hoped that I'd just marry someone who could respect my decision even if he still watched movies with his brothers/friends/whatever, but I couldn't have imagined what a blessing David would be to me.) 

-I went on a lot of first dates and very few second dates, and even fewer third dates. So even though I had a good time and was fairly confident that David would ask me out again (mostly because he was dropping hints that he'd like to ask me out again), I think I was still surprised when he did ask me out. I still feel a tiny bit surprised that we ended up together. (Then the panic sets in, because what if we hadn't ended up together??? I'm just so so lucky to have him.) 

- I do not remember winning the bowling match. But my mom always said that bowling was the best first date, and I remember laughing about how he was already getting points there. And I like bowling.

It's a little crazy to me that we're starting to hit all of these 10 year landmarks. Ten years is a long time! But I also feel like this boy has been a part of my life for all of my life. I guess my heart was just holding space for him and when I finally found him, he fit into that spot so seamlessly it's hard to remember life before him. (Cheesy? I know. But that's what he loves about me, right?)

Happy 10 year mark darlin'! I'm so lucky to have you in my life, then and now.

Valentine's Day

I used to hate Valentine's Day - now I pretty much love it. It's the day that David and I ever spent any real time together, it's the day that we closed on our house, it's a day that I get to be mushy and sappy about how wonderful David is and I don't even have to feel bad about it. 

This year our actual Valentine's Day was pretty low-key. But, last weekend (the 11th-12th) Jenna and Kevin watched our kids so David and I could have a little Babymoon... a getaway before this baby comes. We didn't plan it to be over Valentine's Day, it just ended up working out that way - but it did work out nicely so that we could lump those celebrations together. We dropped the kids off on Saturday morning and they were SO excited to spend the weekend with Camille and Jason. Then we crammed as much fun in the next two days as possible! We did run a few errands, because we are adults and errands are just easier without kids. But we also went out to lunch at Longhorn Steakhouse, went to a comedy show in Provo, binge watched almost half a season of Scorpion (a new series that we like), ate lots of food/candy, slept in, made breakfast together, and went to church where we were able to sit quietly during sacrament meeting without wresting kids or containing cheerios. It was a wonderful weekend and was much appreciated by David and I. It was just so nice to take some time (and really, some extended time - not just a couple of hours) to be together and gear up for having a newborn again. 

 Actual Valentine's Day we didn't do much - but we did get the kids a few treats and a stuffed animal. They loved it! In fact, somehow Lydia got it in here head that for valentines she wanted a teddy bear and heart candy. We had a $10 budget total and the kids absolutely loved it. I'm glad we didn't do anything more because I can't imagine them being any more excited than they already were - but I'm glad we did something because it was fun to see how special and loved they felt.

Aunt Amy came down and surprised the kids with little valentines and fruit! Strawberries for Lydia and pineapple for Austin - she sure knows the way to these kids' hearts. Then she babysat for me while I went Visiting Teaching, which was so incredibly nice of her! (She wasn't planning on it, she just volunteered when I told her that's what I needed to do in the afternoon.) 

Then later that day, Cal and Sue stopped by to bring the kids cookies (and a delicious mini-bunt cake for David and I). These kids sure are lucky to have so many people that love them. 

 Lydia had a preschool Valentine's party the following day "on the 15". She had to pick out and bring 9 valentines for her classmates. She was thrilled about the whole thing. We did her hair with a little heart hair-do and she picked out her purple heart shirt and pink/grey heart pants. They did lots of fun heart-themed activities and she had a great time!

I shared this on Facebook after getting a notification that David and I had been Facebook friends for exactly 9 years (February 14, 2008): 

The first time David and I ever "really" talked was nine years ago on Valentine's Day. We ran into each other on campus and he got an earful about how much I hated the holiday and how I'd been coerced into taking a friend's shift at work that night because "I didn't have a boyfriend". Instead of running the other way- he went home, made me brownies, came to my work that night to keep me company, walked me home, and hung out with me and my crazy roommates in an apartment that looked like Valentine's Day had exploded. I had a friend remind me today how lucky I am that David was so persistent and not easily scared off, and oh, was she right! @David Peaden, I can't even express how grateful I am that nine years ago you stepped into my life and changed it infinitely for the better. Also, Happy Facebook Friend-iversary, because remember nine years ago when becoming facebook friends was a pretty big deal? Yeah.

Also, when looking back at the "memories" on facebook, I saw this facebook post that I had posted at 11:10 in the morning on that fateful February day. "Shantel Walker is wishing she could just stay in bed until Valentines Day is over." Oh, how grateful I am that I did not stay in bed that day. I'm so grateful that I got up, did my college thing, went on a anti-valentine tirade to an unsuspecting boy named David while walking on campus, and unknowingly set myself on the course for this wonderful life that I'm living right now. 

Happy Valentine's Day!