Primary

I don't really have a point to this post. Already, sitting down to write it I am not exactly sure where I was wanting it to go when I thought I should write a post about this. But I've had some thoughts bouncing around in my head lately and so I wanted to record a few things.

I'm coming up on 4.5 years of serving in the Primary Presidency of the TM 2nd Ward. In November of 2013 the Thanksgiving Meadows Ward was split into TM 1st Ward and TM 2nd Ward. I was called to be the secretary in the Primary Presidency. As the "new" ward, we had two weeks to fill all of the callings from nothing and it was crazy. (In fact, including that first reorganization - I just went through my 6th "first of the year" reorganization assigning kids and classes, and all of that craziness!)

In the old TM Ward David was a primary teacher,  but I'd never served in Primary before. Never as a teacher, and maybe only once as a substitute. I think I sat in his classroom only a couple times but only went to sharing time like once. So I had no experience and was feeling a little deer-in-the-headlights. Luckily, I had the opportunity to serve with the most amazing President, Tiffany Flanagan. She was amazing, IS amazing! I admire her so much for so many reasons, at the forefront being her love for the Savior, for the Primary children, and for those around her. She taught me so much about serving in the primary, serving in a presidency, and being a good person.

After about a year and a half, in April 2015, the 1st Counselor in our Primary received a new calling and I was called to replace her. Changing from secretary to the first counselor was a great experience for me. I'll be honest - being a Primary Secretary is a lot of work and the change was good for me.  I loved working with the Nursery and Activity Days and I was able to grow and learn in different ways. This change also meant that I started teaching Sharing Time on Sundays. I feel like it takes time to learn how to teach and entertain and bring the spirit and keep the kids attention all at the same time, but I feel like I was learning and doing an okay job with it.

Then, May of 2016, our presidency was reorganized and I was called to be the new Primary President. I can't even explain the weight that settled onto my shoulders with this new calling. I'd been in the Primary Presidency for almost 3 years but I wasn't prepared for the responsibility I suddenly felt for my Primary kids as well as for my Primary Teachers! I just feel such a great love for them, and such a responsibility for their welfare and well being, both spiritual and physical.

I feel like I'm in a really great place right now. I truly love what I'm doing, and even though it's hard (a lot of work, a lot of energy, a lot of responsibility) - I'm so grateful to be serving my Heavenly Father. Right before I got called as the Primary President, I was starting to feel a little... tired. But when I received the new call, I had to shake the feeling/thought off and determined that I wouldn't allow myself to feel tired or burned out, I had to refresh myself and gear up for the new presidency. I feel like it's a blessing from Heavenly Father that he helped me feel refreshed and revitalized and ready to serve. The other day Bishop Abarca said "You know I'm never going to release you, right?" And I said, "Yep! I'm pretty much planning to serve forever." (Of course, callings come from the Lord, and anything can happen - but I'm not antsy for a new calling or planning for a new calling anytime soon.) I feel like I'm hitting a good groove with my presidency, figuring out the things that important for us, and learning how to delegate and use my resources better.

Right now in Primary alone, we have 18 classes, 33 teachers and almost 160 primary children. That's not including our 3 nursery classes, 6 nursery teachers, 2 nursery music teachers, 2 nursery coordinators and 35 nursery children. We also have a Primary Music Chorister and Pianist, 4 Activity Day Leaders, and over 12 people in the Cub Scouting organization. Plus my two counselors and two secretaries. Oh, and our "Ward Baptism Specialist" who easily makes my calling a thousand times easier and who I am SO grateful for. That's 66 Adults and 195 Children. I sometimes joke about being in charge of a small Army, but in truth it is an army. It's God's Army. I'm overcome with the feeling of responsibility of teaching these small children to have faith in the bedrock principles of the gospel because they will be (and in truth, they already are) fighting a battle. I also feel a huge responsibility for my teachers and leaders in primary. These are the men and women who are on the front lines, teaching these children - but they are each struggling with their own things and hoping for their own spiritual nourishment. The primary children are the future of the church, but these leaders are the people who are the church, right now. They are living their testimonies and if I can do any possible thing to strengthen them and bring them closer to the Lord, then I must do that!

Who’s on the Lord’s side? Who? Now is the time to show.
We ask it fearlessly: Who’s on the Lord’s side? Who?
We wage no common war, Cope with no common foe.
The enemy’s awake; Who’s on the Lord’s side? Who?

We serve the living God, And want his foes to know
That, if but few, we’re great; Who’s on the Lord’s side? Who?
We’re going on to win; No fear must blanch the brow.
The Lord of Hosts is ours; Who’s on the Lord’s side? Who?

We're on the Lord's side. The Lords Army. This is our Primary Army. 

I've had some hard experiences in Primary. Ward Council can be overwhelming to know how many people are struggling without knowing what to do to help. I've had angry teachers and/or parents confronting me in the halls of the church. I've had almost debilitating feelings of inadequacy as I feel like I'll never be able to catch up or to do all the things that I want to do. But I've also had SO many blessings. I feel so fulfilled from this calling. I feel like the things I'm doing are making a difference. I've had parents tell me of their children expressing that they've felt the Holy Ghost during one of my lessons. I've been able to be involved in serving and caring for teachers and children alike. I feel involved in a team (the ward council, my primary presidency, the stake primary), and I feel strengthened by my Heavenly Father. I feel like I have to recognize my smooth and non-throwing up pregnancy with Caleb as a direct blessing because I needed those blessings at the time, and I should probably recognize the same thing about how easy he's been as a baby and how much joy he brings to me with such little stress. I feel the Lord blessing me and strengthening me in my efforts, and that's such a rewarding, encouraging, and precious feeling. 

And I guess that's it. I don't have much more to say. I sometimes shy away from telling people of my calling because I don't want to be interpreted as "I'm amazing, I'm the Primary President, you should be impressed" or something. But I realized the other day that I've said very little about my calling and it's such a HUGE part of my life. It takes up a huge amount of time and it fills my life with spiritual experiences and blessings. I want my life record to show that I worked hard to serve the Lord and was happy to serve wherever he asked me to serve. I want my children to know how important I think Primary is and how much I love being in there with them every week. I just want a record for myself of my experiences and how they impacted me and my testimony. Because I'm grateful for these experiences and this opportunity.