I've been planning to write this post for several months. It's just something that I've been thinking about and it's relevant to my life right now. I've been thinking about the blessings and burdens of leadership in the church and how I want to portray my service in the church, both in my heart and to others. David and I were both recently able to attend a virtual leadership training for our region. It was hosted by Elder Dale G. Renlund and his wife as well as Bonnie H Cordon and her husband. It was amazing and impactful, and something that Elder Renlund said really stuck out to me. As he bore his testimony, he mentioned an experience he had at a stake/regional conference that he spoke at shortly after he was called as an apostle. A young girl and her family approached him and asked him about his new calling, and in his answer - he deferred and deflected - trying to take the attention off of himself but in the process emphasizing the burden instead of the blessing. (I'm paraphrasing here.) He then spoke boldly about the joy he has in serving the Lord and the absolute dedication he has to serving his Savior Jesus Christ. It touched my heart especially because I relate to the story so much. I want to make sure that I always speak the truth that my soul desires to serve the Lord and that I am pleased that He can use me in His work.
Often, if approached, I DO feel uncomfortable with the "Oh you're the (insert calling), you're just so amazing", because I know I'm not anything more than anyone else, but I am willing and ready to serve (and I know many of them are willing and ready, too).
I read an article along this similar vein. It talks about how in our culture we often discourage people from "desiring high callings". Part of it is because of our belief that each calling is important, and that we don't want people to think that they have to be a bishop or relief society president to matter. But there are other parts that I don't completely understand. A calling isn't really something that you "congratulate" someone on receiving, but you also certainly shouldn't express your regret to them for the burden they have ahead. I included the article at the end of the post.
There are blessings and burdens both - but far, far more blessings. I am grateful for the leadership roles I have been able to serve in and that David and I are both currently serving in:
Shantel - Stake Primary President
role- leading my presidency in the following: Supporting the ten ward primaries in the stake, overseeing monthly stake baptisms for the primary children (about 8-11 a month), participating in the Stake Council, speaking monthly in wards in the stake and, right now, assisting in ward conferences. (Plus additional meetings such as a primary president roundtable and regular presidency meetings)
David - Ward Self-Reliance Specialist, Stake Auditor
role- assisting in the work of self-reliance in the ward. Teaching (12-week) self-reliance courses each Tuesday night, working with the Stake Self-Reliance groups, participating in the Ward Council, (Stake Audit - performing audits in wards in the stake including meeting with the wards, and analyzing their budgets.)
It's a busy time for us right now, especially because our church meetings have gone from 3 hours to 2 hours to no church (Covid) to 5 hours (virtual meetings). Many, MANY of our Sundays lately have looked like this: Red is Shantel, Blue is David, Green is together.
With Stake Council, Ward Council, Shantel's Ward Conferences, Virtual Church, Virtual RS & EQ, David's Stake Audit, and David's Self-Reliance meetings, we have very little time together. It's certainly busy, but also has been so neat to be a part of Ward Conferences at the stake level. Both of us are working with some really neat people in some really cool leadership roles right now and it's amazing to see just how many people the Lord needs all serving with their might for this work to move forward.
"God does not begin by asking our ability, only our availability, and if we prove our dependability, He will increase our capability." Neal A. Maxwell.
Some pictures of calling/church related things:
Lydia and I attending a special zoom devotional/training for sisters 8+ following the leadership training meeting that David and I attended with Bonnie H. Cordon and Dale G. Renlund.
David speaking in church while we watched virtually from home. David spoke about having Confidence in the Lord and one of my favorite things he shared was about Trusting in the Lord.
a. Trust= A firm belief in the character and strength of someone, so to trust in the Lord means a firm belief in the Character and Strength of God and the Savior.
b. To build trust then- we must study to understand the character of God and see His power used again and again to bless his people (before, during and after the trial of their faith).
"This is the Church and kingdom of God on earth. Truth has been restored. Live with confidence, optimism, faith, and devotion. Be serious about life’s challenges but not frightened or discouraged by them. Feel the joy of the Saints in the latter days—never crippling anxiety or destructive despair." - {Elder Jeffrey R. Holland.}
Me at Stake Baptisms. Every second Saturday of the month from about 7 am - 2 pm. It's been such a neat experience to be able to work with these baptism children and help them as they step on to the covenant path. (David is in the heart of busy season so he is working every Saturday (sometimes he watches the kids while I'm at Stake Baptisms, sometimes I'm able to get a babysitter. He is always willing to watch the kids, but then he has to work in the afternoon-evening of the Saturday and that's hard.) Doing baptisms through a pandemic has been difficult to say the least. We've had to deal with limiting family numbers to 20 people, then immediate-family only, then immediate family + grandparents. We are wearing masks and sanitizing chairs and doorhandles between each family group. But it has been SO amazing, too. We were able to change the way the stake baptisms were run to a more intimate and spirit-focused day. Children aren't so distracted with the large group party and add-ons to the day and they are really able to focus on the baptism and their covenant with Jesus Christ. The spirit has been present in abundance.
One of our busiest weekends was in February. I had helped with Stake Baptisms the previous week and then that next Saturday I had been asked to teach a breakout class for our Stake Women's Conference. David helped me put together a beautiful powerpoint for my topic, "Personal Revelation, Covenants, and the Power of God in our Lives." (We were up until much after midnight as he helped me turn my very basic powerpoint into something professional and amazing.) I attended the Women's conference and presented for my class which went really great. Then on Sunday morning I was up at 5 am to finish writing out my talk for my Stake Speaking Assignment that day, speaking in the Sunset Hollow Ward at 9 am. The rest of the day was spent participating in the Lehi 51st Ward Conference, which is the Spanish ward in our stake. I arranged for a translator to help in our Primary Presidency meeting that we held together, but wrote out my testimony in Spanish to share with them at the end of our meeting. It was a busy weekend, but it was full of such neat opportunities for me personally.
I'm not sure I was able to get across all the things that have been bouncing around in my head. I just wanted to make these points: our callings are keeping us busy right now and that can sometimes be difficult. But there are so many blessings from serving and I want to express my gratitude for those things.
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Now, this...
There’s an opinion many leaders share when they perceive an individual is desiring to serve in a leadership role.
A bishop, stake president, or mission president might hear that someone would love the opportunity to lead in a formal position, and the leader says something like…
“If you want a leadership calling, then you deserve it.”
“Give him a month as a bishop: that’ll teach him!”
“Sometimes I think those people need the calling so they can see what it’s like.”
These remarks are delivered with a negative or snarky tone in order to communicate the burden of the calling and to question why anyone would desire these positions.
However, it does not correlate with Paul’s opinion in 1 Timothy 3:1, “If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work.”
As someone who has served in many high-profile church leadership capacities, I’ll be the first to recognize the burden that comes with it.
However, relating leadership to a burdensome life is not serving us well.
It heightens the negative connotation of aspiring to a calling or desiring positive influence in a ward, which then discourages the most capable to avoid the “good work.”
It also minimizes the amazing blessings that an individual enjoys in these callings.
For example, as a bishop, I got to witness remarkable redemptive blessings in the lives of others on a weekly basis.
I got to help my ward make decisions that enhanced the gospel experience in the lives of our ward members.
I was publicly praised and thanked for my service and dedication.
I was able to experience the remarkable revelatory process that priesthood keys provide.
I had the opportunity to associate with and learn directly from other remarkable leaders, including seventies, general officers, and even apostles.
Yes, there were extreme burdens that literally caused me to lay awake on many nights.
Yes, the welfare burden in my ward was extremely daunting.
Yes, I was constantly pulled away from my family time and time again.
But the blessings completely outweighed the burden.
Because of this, I’ve dismissed the opinion of “if you want the calling, you deserve it.”
I wish more people desired it because it truly is a “good work.”
May we all avoid any connotation that leadership is too burdensome and should be dodged.
May we never joke that we secretly avoid leadership callings because it would demand too much from us.
When someone jokes that “You’re going to be the next bishop,” let’s reply, “I’d love the opportunity.”
The blessings of leadership will always outweigh the burdens, and if they don’t, take it to the Lord because His “yoke is easy, and [His] burden is light.”
Sincerely,
Kurt Francom
Executive Director
Leading Saints
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